Tuesday, November 30, 2004
Yearning
Oh, how I long for something of interest to report! Alas, my life has been pretty dull of late. In fact, the highlight of my weekend was probably the purchase of a new mouse for my laptop.
Don't get me wrong, it is a fucking awesome mouse, and worth every Yen - but hardly exciting news.
The countdown has well and truly begun - exactly 4 weeks until my last day of work for the year, and 29 days until I touch down in Brisbane for 2 weeks of holiday.
I have also, for perhaps the first time in my life, made a meaningful New Year's resolution. I will change jobs, and by Zarquon, I will do it before my birthday (27th of March - send presents and/or money). I still haven't worked out exactly what I want to do, or where (chances are I will remain in Tokyo) but this particular corporate outpost is slowly sending me insane. It's either change jobs or go postal, and I don't relish the idea of going to jail and enduring a human booster shot from a big guy named Molly, so the mass-murder idea is on the outs.
Don't get me wrong, it is a fucking awesome mouse, and worth every Yen - but hardly exciting news.
The countdown has well and truly begun - exactly 4 weeks until my last day of work for the year, and 29 days until I touch down in Brisbane for 2 weeks of holiday.
I have also, for perhaps the first time in my life, made a meaningful New Year's resolution. I will change jobs, and by Zarquon, I will do it before my birthday (27th of March - send presents and/or money). I still haven't worked out exactly what I want to do, or where (chances are I will remain in Tokyo) but this particular corporate outpost is slowly sending me insane. It's either change jobs or go postal, and I don't relish the idea of going to jail and enduring a human booster shot from a big guy named Molly, so the mass-murder idea is on the outs.
Thursday, November 25, 2004
Malaise
You know that feeling when you had too much beer and not enough sleep the night before? I do, and let me tell you it is not the kind of feeling to instil in you a sense of productivity.
I went out for dinner with Ayaka last night in Machida, to the Izakaya where Natsuyo is currently working (I say currently, becuase she is due to quit at the end of next month). Being the patient friends that we are, we sat around and ate and drank while she worked, then we all bailed and hit up Hub.
Ahhh, Machida Hub. It has been about three years since I have been there - and not a great deal (read: bugger all) has changed. Except maybe a slight upward price revision. After sending a few more beers down to keep the other ones company, some fried chunks of potato and some conversation, we hit the road (as we needed to make the last train home).
The entire night was pretty much a carbon copy of dozens of nights during my study abroad over here, and it was great to relive it. Although, it is a little scary how easily I could just slide back into the old routine of going to Hub and getting sloshed every other night. The joys of student life.
For some reason I still managed to summon the energy to pour myself out of bed and make it to the office this morning. God knows why. This whole 'responsibility' thing is entirely overrated, I really need to find a way to recieve paychecks while behaving however the hell I like and having no regard for things like 'duty' and 'expectations'.
Maybe I should try politics....
I went out for dinner with Ayaka last night in Machida, to the Izakaya where Natsuyo is currently working (I say currently, becuase she is due to quit at the end of next month). Being the patient friends that we are, we sat around and ate and drank while she worked, then we all bailed and hit up Hub.
Ahhh, Machida Hub. It has been about three years since I have been there - and not a great deal (read: bugger all) has changed. Except maybe a slight upward price revision. After sending a few more beers down to keep the other ones company, some fried chunks of potato and some conversation, we hit the road (as we needed to make the last train home).
The entire night was pretty much a carbon copy of dozens of nights during my study abroad over here, and it was great to relive it. Although, it is a little scary how easily I could just slide back into the old routine of going to Hub and getting sloshed every other night. The joys of student life.
For some reason I still managed to summon the energy to pour myself out of bed and make it to the office this morning. God knows why. This whole 'responsibility' thing is entirely overrated, I really need to find a way to recieve paychecks while behaving however the hell I like and having no regard for things like 'duty' and 'expectations'.
Maybe I should try politics....
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
Happy Labour Day, Corporate Nazi Whores
How I failed to rant about this earlier, I have no idea, but here goes:
Guess what day it is in Japan today? Labour Day! The day traditionally set aside for workers to have a day off - as a reward for their efforts every other day of the year.
Heaven forbid the company that I work for be pretty much the only one in the entire damn country that ignores minor things like national holidays. Admittedly, the trains are far less crowded, and the commute is a lot more pleasant - but on the flipside there is hardly anywhere open for lunch and just about every business barring convenience stores and the train stations are closed. I bet the situation would be different if our HR department wasn't composed entirely of people with no lives outside the walls of our little corporate bastion.... and it is such a nice day outside today too.
... and people wonder why I want to quit my job.
Guess what day it is in Japan today? Labour Day! The day traditionally set aside for workers to have a day off - as a reward for their efforts every other day of the year.
Heaven forbid the company that I work for be pretty much the only one in the entire damn country that ignores minor things like national holidays. Admittedly, the trains are far less crowded, and the commute is a lot more pleasant - but on the flipside there is hardly anywhere open for lunch and just about every business barring convenience stores and the train stations are closed. I bet the situation would be different if our HR department wasn't composed entirely of people with no lives outside the walls of our little corporate bastion.... and it is such a nice day outside today too.
... and people wonder why I want to quit my job.
Picture Hosting and Inconvenience Stores
My picture hosting problems have been solved, with a little help from Ben a.k.a. MasterCyl over at -=Lansmash=-. Now all I need to do is get my pictures uploaded and redirect some links. With some luck, I will get around to this tonight.
In other news, I have learned an imporant lesson this week on taking things for granted. My local Lawson convenience store, situated an incredibly convenient hundred metres down the road from my flat is undergoing refurbishment this week - pretty much eliminating any utility it once had as a place for me to play consumer. After such a long and happy relationship, for this week I have been forced to choose between the close, but less appealing Family Mart a little way across the road and the large, but distant 7-11 further down the street. Both of which require more walking, and therefore less convenience. Woe betide me. Kinda.
It disturbs me somewhat the degree to which I have become dependent on having a 24-hour store a mere minute down the road from me - I have no idea how long it will take me to get over the withdrawl should I return to Australia.
In other news, I have learned an imporant lesson this week on taking things for granted. My local Lawson convenience store, situated an incredibly convenient hundred metres down the road from my flat is undergoing refurbishment this week - pretty much eliminating any utility it once had as a place for me to play consumer. After such a long and happy relationship, for this week I have been forced to choose between the close, but less appealing Family Mart a little way across the road and the large, but distant 7-11 further down the street. Both of which require more walking, and therefore less convenience. Woe betide me. Kinda.
It disturbs me somewhat the degree to which I have become dependent on having a 24-hour store a mere minute down the road from me - I have no idea how long it will take me to get over the withdrawl should I return to Australia.
Monday, November 22, 2004
Boomtown Rats Style
Anoint me again as one of the slavering masses. Allow me to add my voice to the clamouring cacophonic cry of "I hate Mondays!" One minute, you are warm and comfortable, lying in bed - before you know it, you are once again planted in front of your desk harbouring resentment for the middle management.
On the plus side, my weekend was a good one - if somewhat quiet. Really, the only event worthy of a mention was the (rather lengthy) spell spent at Torihide (my local yakitori bar). Many people claim that alcohol improves your foreign language ability - to a point. Let it be known that I agree with them. Let the records show that my threshold is about 5 beers. By the time I was into my sixth, I noticed my ability to converse in Japanese regressing - my comprehension didn't suffer greatly, I just lost the ability to give much a reply. I was still perfectly capable of making it to the video store and renting Shrek 2, however.
I am not sure it if was the alcohol, or the fact that it was an enjoyable movie - but I did enjoy watching Shrek 2. To the point where there is now a slightly less-than-legal copy sitting atop my small pile of less-than-legally copied DVDs. One thing I thoroughly enjoyed about the film, (similarly to the original Shrek movie) was the soundtrack. It is pretty well-known that I am a bit of an Eels fanboy, and the musical genious of Mr. E (aka Mark Oliver Everett) has featured in both films. However, what really won me over was the addition of Tom Waits. Sure, he might sound like he has been gargling gravel every morning for the past twenty years, but I just can't help but enjoy his music. His cameo as the pianist in the seedy bar (The Poison Apple, from memory) was utterly tops.
Let it also be said that Cameron Diaz is a far less annoying actress when heard and not seen.
I am also going to use this relatively public forum to unleash my frustration with translating companies. Invariably, whenver we produce something in-house in Japanese (text for annual reports/operating manuals and the like), we outsource the translation for some exorbitant amount - which is fine. My translating skills aren't good enough that I could do it, and there are few in the company who, I belive, could. The problem I have is when these 'professionally translated' documents come back and I have to proof read them. What irks me even more is the fact that I have to correct puncutation/grammar/sentence structure every second fucking line. For the amount we are paying, our translations should come back written with such aptitude that even the most pedantic person would have trouble finding fault - yet here I am, once again, correcting the mistakes of people paid far more than me. Just quietly, that shits me. Shits me right off.
I read Engrish for fun, I don't expect to have to deal with it at work.
On the plus side, my weekend was a good one - if somewhat quiet. Really, the only event worthy of a mention was the (rather lengthy) spell spent at Torihide (my local yakitori bar). Many people claim that alcohol improves your foreign language ability - to a point. Let it be known that I agree with them. Let the records show that my threshold is about 5 beers. By the time I was into my sixth, I noticed my ability to converse in Japanese regressing - my comprehension didn't suffer greatly, I just lost the ability to give much a reply. I was still perfectly capable of making it to the video store and renting Shrek 2, however.
I am not sure it if was the alcohol, or the fact that it was an enjoyable movie - but I did enjoy watching Shrek 2. To the point where there is now a slightly less-than-legal copy sitting atop my small pile of less-than-legally copied DVDs. One thing I thoroughly enjoyed about the film, (similarly to the original Shrek movie) was the soundtrack. It is pretty well-known that I am a bit of an Eels fanboy, and the musical genious of Mr. E (aka Mark Oliver Everett) has featured in both films. However, what really won me over was the addition of Tom Waits. Sure, he might sound like he has been gargling gravel every morning for the past twenty years, but I just can't help but enjoy his music. His cameo as the pianist in the seedy bar (The Poison Apple, from memory) was utterly tops.
Let it also be said that Cameron Diaz is a far less annoying actress when heard and not seen.
I am also going to use this relatively public forum to unleash my frustration with translating companies. Invariably, whenver we produce something in-house in Japanese (text for annual reports/operating manuals and the like), we outsource the translation for some exorbitant amount - which is fine. My translating skills aren't good enough that I could do it, and there are few in the company who, I belive, could. The problem I have is when these 'professionally translated' documents come back and I have to proof read them. What irks me even more is the fact that I have to correct puncutation/grammar/sentence structure every second fucking line. For the amount we are paying, our translations should come back written with such aptitude that even the most pedantic person would have trouble finding fault - yet here I am, once again, correcting the mistakes of people paid far more than me. Just quietly, that shits me. Shits me right off.
I read Engrish for fun, I don't expect to have to deal with it at work.
Friday, November 19, 2004
Spacing out
It is truly remarkable how little work I have accomplished today. The fact that nobody seems to care really only gives me an incentive to continue. The challenging part about being slack at the office is finding new things to look at on the internet. There's a lot of stuff there, but finding interesting things that you can view in the office without arousing attention from the higher-ups does offer some challenges.
Thus far I appear to be coming out on top.
I spent a bit of yesterday afternoon reading up on Irezumi, which is traditional Japanese tattoo (the hardcore, full-body "I am a human canvas" kind of stuff). Facinating stuff. I shall leave you a couple of links if you wish to pursue the topic much futher. I find the idea of having one's skin tattooed in its entirety intrugiung, and (dare I say it) attractive on some level deep in my subconscious. Of course, the cost and time commitment - not to mention the difficulty in finding an Irezumi tattooist to do the work makes the whole thing completely impractical. The fact that you couldn't flick a 'tattoo on/tattoo off' switch also turns me off the idea. Sure, it might be cool now - but give it 10 years. Or less. Tattoos are probably a less-than-clever idea for the occasionally impulsive. Myself included.
My impulses are much better suited to situations where questions like 'Do you want another drink?' are being posed. Last night I met up with Natsuyo and Ayaka in Yokohama for a rather lengthy stay at the Wara-wara Izakaya near Yokohama station. You know the one. Japanese as a language - in it's correct form, isn't overly difficult if you leave out the written side of things. There are numerous rules and few exceptions - unlike English, which is just a thrown-together linguistic clusterfuck.
One beef I do have with the Japanese language is the numerous forms that words can take, and should take depending on whether you are adressing a friend, a subordinate, a superior or the Emperor. Casual Japanese isn't that difficult, except of course that there are words that girls can (and do use) that guys do not (and vice versa, to a lesser degree). So, when trying to understand two Japanese girls in coversation, you do not merely need to understand Japanese, or casual Japanese - but you have to try to decipher the J-girl dialect. The fact that they talk a mile a minute only serves to make this task more difficult. Trying to do this after a full day of work (or at least, full day spent at the office) and a few beers will only confuse you.
That said, the night was fun, and I was only moderately tired with a mild hangover when I dragged myself out of bed this morning.
In other news, I don't really have much other news. That is all.
Thus far I appear to be coming out on top.
I spent a bit of yesterday afternoon reading up on Irezumi, which is traditional Japanese tattoo (the hardcore, full-body "I am a human canvas" kind of stuff). Facinating stuff. I shall leave you a couple of links if you wish to pursue the topic much futher. I find the idea of having one's skin tattooed in its entirety intrugiung, and (dare I say it) attractive on some level deep in my subconscious. Of course, the cost and time commitment - not to mention the difficulty in finding an Irezumi tattooist to do the work makes the whole thing completely impractical. The fact that you couldn't flick a 'tattoo on/tattoo off' switch also turns me off the idea. Sure, it might be cool now - but give it 10 years. Or less. Tattoos are probably a less-than-clever idea for the occasionally impulsive. Myself included.
My impulses are much better suited to situations where questions like 'Do you want another drink?' are being posed. Last night I met up with Natsuyo and Ayaka in Yokohama for a rather lengthy stay at the Wara-wara Izakaya near Yokohama station. You know the one. Japanese as a language - in it's correct form, isn't overly difficult if you leave out the written side of things. There are numerous rules and few exceptions - unlike English, which is just a thrown-together linguistic clusterfuck.
One beef I do have with the Japanese language is the numerous forms that words can take, and should take depending on whether you are adressing a friend, a subordinate, a superior or the Emperor. Casual Japanese isn't that difficult, except of course that there are words that girls can (and do use) that guys do not (and vice versa, to a lesser degree). So, when trying to understand two Japanese girls in coversation, you do not merely need to understand Japanese, or casual Japanese - but you have to try to decipher the J-girl dialect. The fact that they talk a mile a minute only serves to make this task more difficult. Trying to do this after a full day of work (or at least, full day spent at the office) and a few beers will only confuse you.
That said, the night was fun, and I was only moderately tired with a mild hangover when I dragged myself out of bed this morning.
In other news, I don't really have much other news. That is all.
Thursday, November 18, 2004
Getting the Picture
Yes, I am aware some of my images on the blog are broken. I am in the process of hunting down a decent place to host them. It may even wind up with a small transaction between me and the owner of another website. For the moment, you will have to be content with my words alone, words which assure you that I shall try to resolve this issue over the weekend.
In other news, my path of whore-like book consumption (seriously, I am accumulating reading material at a frightening rate - this normally wouldn't be a problem, except that I don't have much room for another bookshelf in my flat, but anyway) has led me to another utter gem by Charles Stross. The Atrocity Archives (his first published novel) is one of the best books I have read in years - and that is based upon the first two chapters which I read on the train this morning. If you enjoy sci-fi, find this book and read it.
In other news, my path of whore-like book consumption (seriously, I am accumulating reading material at a frightening rate - this normally wouldn't be a problem, except that I don't have much room for another bookshelf in my flat, but anyway) has led me to another utter gem by Charles Stross. The Atrocity Archives (his first published novel) is one of the best books I have read in years - and that is based upon the first two chapters which I read on the train this morning. If you enjoy sci-fi, find this book and read it.
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
Mixed Blessings
Well, it has been over a week since my last update here - and with good reason! I have spent it doing a training course at our Sagamihara factory. It wasn't particularly riveting, but amusing at times as the other participants (Tim, our Detroit Sales Manager and John, our UK Prouduction Manager) came to terms with Japanese culture - corporate and otherwise.
It was also a good chance for me to hone my rather woeful translation skills (the amount of specialised plastics, manufacturing, sales and accounting vocabulary I had to look up was phenomenal), but the fact that I was translating of course resulted in me paying a little more attention to what was being said than I normally would have - which I guess means I may have got something out of the experience. I dunno. At the very least, I did get out of the office for a week - not to mention a few free meals.
I also did the gracious host/tour guide thing on Saturday and took Tim and John into Tokyo (it was their first time in Japan) and it gave me a chance to play tourist a bit too, which I don't bother with very often. We checked out the Sensoji Temple in Asakusa - which is pretty cool, as far as temples go, made a brief stop in Akihabara to look at the latest in electronics, wandered through the ever-crowded, narrow lanes of Harajuku, marvelling at the outlandish garb some young Japanese find themselves clad in and finally hit up Shibuya. I imagine that for someone who hasn't see it before (I can't even remember my first time) that Shibuya Crossing on a Saturday night is pretty impressive. It's certainly nothing like back home (where 'back home' could be pretty much anywhere outside of Asia), and the guys were pretty stunned by the sheer volume of people filling the streets.
To cap off the day, I mixed two of the best ingredients for a fun night out - in the form of Hub happy hour and dinner at The Lockup. (I always tell people that Lockup is somewhere you have to go, at least once - I have lost count of how many times I have been there.) Somewhat sozzled, we made it to the station and caught suitable trains back home.
The night before (and I am jumping around chronologically here for a reason, I promise) I caught up with a few of the current and former girls from work. Anne and Mayuko being the former ones - much of the dinner conversation was spent bitching about work - which is pretty much a staple topic for people who have/do work here. Turns out that life on the outside is a little better, and with Mayuko assistant VP at a bank in Tokyo, one of Anne's friends 1 week from starting a job as a recruiting agent and various other opportunities abounding in this fair city, I admitted that I was pretty much ready for a change - a change with a higher salary, of course.
Having said that, out of the blue, I return to work in Tokyo this morning - my boss comes over and hands me a sheet of paper. Before I really get a chance to read it, he explains that I will, from now on recieve semi-annual bonuses (issued in December and June), effectively adding over 10% to my annual salary. Obviously, this is awesome news and I am utterly stoked. I am at a complete and utter loss however to understand why or how the hell my pay jumped so sharply. Have I done anything extraordinary? Nope. Do I really do anything? Well, sometimes... Admittedly, I have just completed my first full year of work here, but I know perfectly well that my raise is considerably better than the basic annual increase, so I don't know what's going on.
If these guys are trying to positively reinforce my current work habits, they should make sure I am actually doing work to begin with. Although, on the flip side, I will definitely be sticking around to recieve my December bonus. I may need it to cover moving costs and a deposit on a new flat.
However, as the title of todays little (or long) rant may suggest, it is not all the proverbial peaches and cream. Due to some mysterious reason, that Yuki didn't want to talk about in front of the other people in the office, my next planned trip to Australia has been, sadly, cancelled. While it is a bit of a bummer, I was consoled with the fact that I will probably score a trip early next year. Not to mention the fact that I am still coming over in six weeks anyway, so I guess I can stick this one out. I mean, it's only another six weeks and thirteen hours to wait. Not that I'm counting.
It was also a good chance for me to hone my rather woeful translation skills (the amount of specialised plastics, manufacturing, sales and accounting vocabulary I had to look up was phenomenal), but the fact that I was translating of course resulted in me paying a little more attention to what was being said than I normally would have - which I guess means I may have got something out of the experience. I dunno. At the very least, I did get out of the office for a week - not to mention a few free meals.
I also did the gracious host/tour guide thing on Saturday and took Tim and John into Tokyo (it was their first time in Japan) and it gave me a chance to play tourist a bit too, which I don't bother with very often. We checked out the Sensoji Temple in Asakusa - which is pretty cool, as far as temples go, made a brief stop in Akihabara to look at the latest in electronics, wandered through the ever-crowded, narrow lanes of Harajuku, marvelling at the outlandish garb some young Japanese find themselves clad in and finally hit up Shibuya. I imagine that for someone who hasn't see it before (I can't even remember my first time) that Shibuya Crossing on a Saturday night is pretty impressive. It's certainly nothing like back home (where 'back home' could be pretty much anywhere outside of Asia), and the guys were pretty stunned by the sheer volume of people filling the streets.
To cap off the day, I mixed two of the best ingredients for a fun night out - in the form of Hub happy hour and dinner at The Lockup. (I always tell people that Lockup is somewhere you have to go, at least once - I have lost count of how many times I have been there.) Somewhat sozzled, we made it to the station and caught suitable trains back home.
The night before (and I am jumping around chronologically here for a reason, I promise) I caught up with a few of the current and former girls from work. Anne and Mayuko being the former ones - much of the dinner conversation was spent bitching about work - which is pretty much a staple topic for people who have/do work here. Turns out that life on the outside is a little better, and with Mayuko assistant VP at a bank in Tokyo, one of Anne's friends 1 week from starting a job as a recruiting agent and various other opportunities abounding in this fair city, I admitted that I was pretty much ready for a change - a change with a higher salary, of course.
Having said that, out of the blue, I return to work in Tokyo this morning - my boss comes over and hands me a sheet of paper. Before I really get a chance to read it, he explains that I will, from now on recieve semi-annual bonuses (issued in December and June), effectively adding over 10% to my annual salary. Obviously, this is awesome news and I am utterly stoked. I am at a complete and utter loss however to understand why or how the hell my pay jumped so sharply. Have I done anything extraordinary? Nope. Do I really do anything? Well, sometimes... Admittedly, I have just completed my first full year of work here, but I know perfectly well that my raise is considerably better than the basic annual increase, so I don't know what's going on.
If these guys are trying to positively reinforce my current work habits, they should make sure I am actually doing work to begin with. Although, on the flip side, I will definitely be sticking around to recieve my December bonus. I may need it to cover moving costs and a deposit on a new flat.
However, as the title of todays little (or long) rant may suggest, it is not all the proverbial peaches and cream. Due to some mysterious reason, that Yuki didn't want to talk about in front of the other people in the office, my next planned trip to Australia has been, sadly, cancelled. While it is a bit of a bummer, I was consoled with the fact that I will probably score a trip early next year. Not to mention the fact that I am still coming over in six weeks anyway, so I guess I can stick this one out. I mean, it's only another six weeks and thirteen hours to wait. Not that I'm counting.
Tuesday, November 09, 2004
Pictures from the Motor Show
As promised! Sure, they aren't brilliant quality, but I'm sure you will all get over it.
Toyota's Future Truck Concept:
Toyota's Hiace Concept - The Sound Satellite:
(Note: DJs and Dancing Crowd do not come standard)
This not-so-little sucker from Hino (Toyota's truck subsidiary) is due to compete in the 2005 Paris-Dakar Rally:
This little baby from Toyota, dubbed the PM, is basically where they see transportation going in the future. Single-person transportation, overly colourful with all sorts of electronics, telemetrics, holographic displays and just about anything else you would see on the bridge of the Enterprise. The concept itself if a year or two old now, but due to the huge crowds that normally surround it at motor shows, this is one of the first times I have managed to take a decent picture of it.
I shall conclude this little presentation with some wonderful engrish, courtesty of Mitsubishi-Fuso. They are releasing a new range of heavy trucks called the "Super Great" range. On it's own, that name made me smile. Apply it to a dump truck, and whaddya get? Amusement, for one:
Toyota's Future Truck Concept:
Toyota's Hiace Concept - The Sound Satellite:
(Note: DJs and Dancing Crowd do not come standard)
This not-so-little sucker from Hino (Toyota's truck subsidiary) is due to compete in the 2005 Paris-Dakar Rally:
This little baby from Toyota, dubbed the PM, is basically where they see transportation going in the future. Single-person transportation, overly colourful with all sorts of electronics, telemetrics, holographic displays and just about anything else you would see on the bridge of the Enterprise. The concept itself if a year or two old now, but due to the huge crowds that normally surround it at motor shows, this is one of the first times I have managed to take a decent picture of it.
I shall conclude this little presentation with some wonderful engrish, courtesty of Mitsubishi-Fuso. They are releasing a new range of heavy trucks called the "Super Great" range. On it's own, that name made me smile. Apply it to a dump truck, and whaddya get? Amusement, for one:
Monkey Sperm and Female Infidelity
Some of what I am about to say has to do directly with this article, which I lifted from The Australian this morning.
It's not every day I have an opportunity to read and/or write about testicle size, so I though I should make use of it - who knows when it will happen again.
The article relates to a study done on the sperm count and testicle size of a dozen species of primate. Humans included. Basically the findings were that the more promiscuious the females of a given species, the higher the sperm count of the male - because during sex his sperm was in direct competition with the sperm of rival males. As a result, male chimpanzees, whose female counterparts are apparently the filthy harlots of the primate world have a very high sperm count and massive balls for their body size. Gorillas on the other hand, with particularly faithful females have comparatively diminuitive gonads.
Humans, it turns out fall somewhere in between. I will conclude this little discussion with two select paragraphs from the article:
"It is likely that our female ancestors cheated on their spouses often enough to leave men with room for doubt about their paternity."
Are women just as inlcined to infidelity as men are constantly painted to be? There are certain genetic clues pointing towards a 'yes'. I could probably name a small sample of my female friends to give weight to this argument - but I am not going to.
I will leave you with a more thorough explanation of why a high sperm count is neccessary in species with promiscuious females:
"Making more sperm is not the only way of boosting a male's chances of fertilising an egg. If his partner might be cheating on him, he can improve his prospects by producing sticky semen that coagulates in the vagina, creating a "chastity belt" that stops rival sperm from getting past."
It's not every day I have an opportunity to read and/or write about testicle size, so I though I should make use of it - who knows when it will happen again.
The article relates to a study done on the sperm count and testicle size of a dozen species of primate. Humans included. Basically the findings were that the more promiscuious the females of a given species, the higher the sperm count of the male - because during sex his sperm was in direct competition with the sperm of rival males. As a result, male chimpanzees, whose female counterparts are apparently the filthy harlots of the primate world have a very high sperm count and massive balls for their body size. Gorillas on the other hand, with particularly faithful females have comparatively diminuitive gonads.
Humans, it turns out fall somewhere in between. I will conclude this little discussion with two select paragraphs from the article:
"It is likely that our female ancestors cheated on their spouses often enough to leave men with room for doubt about their paternity."
Are women just as inlcined to infidelity as men are constantly painted to be? There are certain genetic clues pointing towards a 'yes'. I could probably name a small sample of my female friends to give weight to this argument - but I am not going to.
I will leave you with a more thorough explanation of why a high sperm count is neccessary in species with promiscuious females:
"Making more sperm is not the only way of boosting a male's chances of fertilising an egg. If his partner might be cheating on him, he can improve his prospects by producing sticky semen that coagulates in the vagina, creating a "chastity belt" that stops rival sperm from getting past."
Monday, November 08, 2004
I went all the way to Chiba for sports cars and beer, and all I got was beer!
As it turned out, the motorshow on Friday was commercial vehicles only (ie. trucks/vans/buses and the like), so I missed out on seeing the sports cars I had looked forward to. There were a few models (surprisingly the tyre companies had amongst the most attractive ones) and there was also plenty of beer. When you take into account the fact that it got me the afternoon off work, with pay - I guess I still came out on top.
Unfortunately, I have not uploaded any of the photos yet, but there were one or two vehicles that took my eye. Both Toyota, as it happens. The first was an utterly gargantuan crewcab ute (that's a pickup truck, my American friends). While still only a concept, this thing was about the same size as a Hummer. Utterly ridiculous and impractical for pretty much anything, which probably means it will sell really well in the US once the rap stars begin buying these things and pimping them out.
The other vehicle, which was really rather spiffy, was a concept vehicle for the new Toyota Hiace (which, in Australia at least tends to be your standard, white, tradesman's van). This one however, was slightly larger than it's plumber-carrying brethren, shiny purple with retractable plasma screens and an interior that folded out into mixing decks and a bank of speakers and lights. Dubbed the 'Sound Satellite', it was by far the coolest thing at the motor show, and once I get them uploaded, I will provide pictoral evidence that this thing exists.
My Saturday was fairly cruisy, and only moderately eventful. I did a bit of wandering around Sakuragicho and hit up the cinema in the World Porter building with Aki, one of Mike's old ex-girlfriends. I find it a little odd that I end up hanging out with his exes, (well, OK, only two of them - which is just a drop in the bucket really) but if nothing else, Mike seems to be good at dumping/getting dumped by girls who live in Yokohama and can show me around.
Anyway, back to the cinema, after some deliberation (Mike also has a knack for choosing girls with practically no decision-making ability - maybe that's how he get's so many...) we ended up seeing Secret Window, complete with Johnny Depp, Philip Glass soundtrack and based on a Stephen King novella (as well as the chick who played Rosie, the hooker, in Payback - a classic movie of the 'Arsekickery' genre). I really didn't mind this film, it was a pretty typical King-style suspense/thriller and while a little slow in parts, overall entertaining. It was also a poignant (well not really) reminder of how useful, but under-used the humble shovel is as a weapon. Not enough shovel-related combat in movies - or real life for that matter. I want to see the next issue of Lynch Mobbing Monthly with the words "Shovel - It's the new pitchfork" emblazoned on the cover. (There are actually less shovel-related killings in this movie than you would think from my previous few sentences, but I felt that it desevered a mention).
Somewhere in there I made the fatal mistake of going into the HMV. It is no secret that I have pretty much zero self-restraint when it comes to purchasing music - and 4 CDs later, (my point well and truly proven, yet again) I had sated my uncontrollable urges for music. The latest and greatest additions to my collection: Fatboy Slim - Palookaville, Ben Folds Five (self titled), Chemical Brothers - Come With Us and Tom Waits - Real Gone. All four are worth a listen.
Anyway, post-film we headed over to the Red Brick Warehouse (the Aka-Renga Soko, for those playing the Japanese game). I had only ever heard of this place, never actually been in there - as it turns out, it is nothing more than an old (red brick) warehouse from the 1900's which has been converted into a small mall. It was pretty funky inside - some effort had been made to keep the 'old warehouse' feel, and there were some pretty cool furniture stores in there as well. One thing I have noticed in my time here, is that you can buy all sorts of cool furniture over here - if you are willing to pay an arm, a leg and sign away the soul of your first-born. Of course, the fact that I have pretty much zero space for any new furniture, regardless, turns the average furniture-shopping experience into little more than 'sitting on sofas to see if they are as comfy as they look'. For the record - quite often, they are.
Anyway, where was I? Trying out sofas... Well, after all the pseudo-furniture shopping, we wandered into Kannai and hit up an Izakaya that Aki assured me was good. Well, I can't fault her on that. It was. Next time I am in Kannai and looking for dinner, I will probably go back. While I can't remember the name (I just can't, it has nothing to do with the several beers I knocked back once inside), I can remember eating some damn tasty food. The shabu-shabu was particularly good, the fact that they trust you with a portable gas stove in a licensed restaurant and let you cook your own food makes me wonder sometimes, but I guess there can't have been any serious accidents before, otherwise it would probably be illegal.
I headed home after dinner, and despite being tired as hell, had the urge to watch Kill Bill 2 again - so I did.
Sunday I pretty much just lazed around, slept, ate and listened to my new CDs. The new Fatboy Slim album is highly reccomended, for those who are into that sort of thing. The new Tom Waits album, likewise.
Unfortunately, I have not uploaded any of the photos yet, but there were one or two vehicles that took my eye. Both Toyota, as it happens. The first was an utterly gargantuan crewcab ute (that's a pickup truck, my American friends). While still only a concept, this thing was about the same size as a Hummer. Utterly ridiculous and impractical for pretty much anything, which probably means it will sell really well in the US once the rap stars begin buying these things and pimping them out.
The other vehicle, which was really rather spiffy, was a concept vehicle for the new Toyota Hiace (which, in Australia at least tends to be your standard, white, tradesman's van). This one however, was slightly larger than it's plumber-carrying brethren, shiny purple with retractable plasma screens and an interior that folded out into mixing decks and a bank of speakers and lights. Dubbed the 'Sound Satellite', it was by far the coolest thing at the motor show, and once I get them uploaded, I will provide pictoral evidence that this thing exists.
My Saturday was fairly cruisy, and only moderately eventful. I did a bit of wandering around Sakuragicho and hit up the cinema in the World Porter building with Aki, one of Mike's old ex-girlfriends. I find it a little odd that I end up hanging out with his exes, (well, OK, only two of them - which is just a drop in the bucket really) but if nothing else, Mike seems to be good at dumping/getting dumped by girls who live in Yokohama and can show me around.
Anyway, back to the cinema, after some deliberation (Mike also has a knack for choosing girls with practically no decision-making ability - maybe that's how he get's so many...) we ended up seeing Secret Window, complete with Johnny Depp, Philip Glass soundtrack and based on a Stephen King novella (as well as the chick who played Rosie, the hooker, in Payback - a classic movie of the 'Arsekickery' genre). I really didn't mind this film, it was a pretty typical King-style suspense/thriller and while a little slow in parts, overall entertaining. It was also a poignant (well not really) reminder of how useful, but under-used the humble shovel is as a weapon. Not enough shovel-related combat in movies - or real life for that matter. I want to see the next issue of Lynch Mobbing Monthly with the words "Shovel - It's the new pitchfork" emblazoned on the cover. (There are actually less shovel-related killings in this movie than you would think from my previous few sentences, but I felt that it desevered a mention).
Somewhere in there I made the fatal mistake of going into the HMV. It is no secret that I have pretty much zero self-restraint when it comes to purchasing music - and 4 CDs later, (my point well and truly proven, yet again) I had sated my uncontrollable urges for music. The latest and greatest additions to my collection: Fatboy Slim - Palookaville, Ben Folds Five (self titled), Chemical Brothers - Come With Us and Tom Waits - Real Gone. All four are worth a listen.
Anyway, post-film we headed over to the Red Brick Warehouse (the Aka-Renga Soko, for those playing the Japanese game). I had only ever heard of this place, never actually been in there - as it turns out, it is nothing more than an old (red brick) warehouse from the 1900's which has been converted into a small mall. It was pretty funky inside - some effort had been made to keep the 'old warehouse' feel, and there were some pretty cool furniture stores in there as well. One thing I have noticed in my time here, is that you can buy all sorts of cool furniture over here - if you are willing to pay an arm, a leg and sign away the soul of your first-born. Of course, the fact that I have pretty much zero space for any new furniture, regardless, turns the average furniture-shopping experience into little more than 'sitting on sofas to see if they are as comfy as they look'. For the record - quite often, they are.
Anyway, where was I? Trying out sofas... Well, after all the pseudo-furniture shopping, we wandered into Kannai and hit up an Izakaya that Aki assured me was good. Well, I can't fault her on that. It was. Next time I am in Kannai and looking for dinner, I will probably go back. While I can't remember the name (I just can't, it has nothing to do with the several beers I knocked back once inside), I can remember eating some damn tasty food. The shabu-shabu was particularly good, the fact that they trust you with a portable gas stove in a licensed restaurant and let you cook your own food makes me wonder sometimes, but I guess there can't have been any serious accidents before, otherwise it would probably be illegal.
I headed home after dinner, and despite being tired as hell, had the urge to watch Kill Bill 2 again - so I did.
Sunday I pretty much just lazed around, slept, ate and listened to my new CDs. The new Fatboy Slim album is highly reccomended, for those who are into that sort of thing. The new Tom Waits album, likewise.
Friday, November 05, 2004
Working Hard
What's better than going to the 2005 Tokyo Motor Show?
Doing it in work time on a Friday afternoon with one of your friends from the department downstairs. Looks like beer o'clock to me! The fact that the place will be packed with the latest and greatest cars (not to mention a wide array of models draping themselves on said cars) just makes it that little bit sweeter.
Report, with photos, will follow.
Doing it in work time on a Friday afternoon with one of your friends from the department downstairs. Looks like beer o'clock to me! The fact that the place will be packed with the latest and greatest cars (not to mention a wide array of models draping themselves on said cars) just makes it that little bit sweeter.
Report, with photos, will follow.
Thursday, November 04, 2004
Lions do not respond positively to religious zeal
In a move that could have won him a Darwin Award had it gone a bit further, a man leapt into the lion enclosure at Taipei Zoo in an attempt to convert the animals dwelling therein to Christianity.
After shouting "Jesus will save you!" following by "Come bite me!" one of the male lions felt it only prudent to oblige, biting the man on his leg and giving him a good old scratching.
Before things became too entertaining however, the lions were called off the attack by zoo workers brandishing hoses and tranquiliser guns.
Reuters has the story here, along with video footage of the event, which I must admit, I found more than a little entertaining.
Apparently the prediliction for eating christians has stayed with the lions since their Roman employment, centuries ago. I'm surpised Dubya hasn't tried
After shouting "Jesus will save you!" following by "Come bite me!" one of the male lions felt it only prudent to oblige, biting the man on his leg and giving him a good old scratching.
Before things became too entertaining however, the lions were called off the attack by zoo workers brandishing hoses and tranquiliser guns.
Reuters has the story here, along with video footage of the event, which I must admit, I found more than a little entertaining.
Apparently the prediliction for eating christians has stayed with the lions since their Roman employment, centuries ago. I'm surpised Dubya hasn't tried
The plot thickens....
It appears that the F900iC is available with the bilingual option, which is a bonus.
Titan black however, appears more of a lame grey.
Can't win 'em all...
Titan black however, appears more of a lame grey.
Can't win 'em all...
I don't really need a new mobile...
However, today's Slashdot brought my attention to the fact that the nice people at Sony have developed the FeliCa, a contactless IC card system. Basically, electronic wallet, ID, train ticket, credit card - the whole shebang, all in one. That on it's own isn't really enough to inspire much in me. Sure, it's nifty, but why should I care?
Very simple. In the form of their F900iC handset, DoCoMo have added this nifty little feature to their latest mobile phones. As someone who uses train passes several times a day, and someone who is frequently fishing into his wallet for cash/cards, the sheer utility of something like this is enough to make me take notice.
Naturally, the phone will come with a fatty-boombatty camera, internet capabilities and all the other bells and whistles that Japanese mobile phones have considered 'standard' for aeons. In fact, if it turns out these little babies can play the bilingual game, I just might find myself signing up. Even without the benefits of my mother tongue, they look mighty appealing. The phone even comes in 'Titan Black'. I don't know exactly what colour that is, but I bet it looks impressive.
Of course, the fact that my year-old, baby blue AU is still doing a perfectly serviceable job as a mobile communications device really begs the questions "Do I need this?" The answer, unsurprisingly, is a resounding 'Nope, definitely not.' But that, as well all know, does very little to reduce the allure of the latest and greatest... I plan on doing a little shopping on Saturday, should I pass a DoCoMo shop, I may find myself stopping in for a chat...
Very simple. In the form of their F900iC handset, DoCoMo have added this nifty little feature to their latest mobile phones. As someone who uses train passes several times a day, and someone who is frequently fishing into his wallet for cash/cards, the sheer utility of something like this is enough to make me take notice.
Naturally, the phone will come with a fatty-boombatty camera, internet capabilities and all the other bells and whistles that Japanese mobile phones have considered 'standard' for aeons. In fact, if it turns out these little babies can play the bilingual game, I just might find myself signing up. Even without the benefits of my mother tongue, they look mighty appealing. The phone even comes in 'Titan Black'. I don't know exactly what colour that is, but I bet it looks impressive.
Of course, the fact that my year-old, baby blue AU is still doing a perfectly serviceable job as a mobile communications device really begs the questions "Do I need this?" The answer, unsurprisingly, is a resounding 'Nope, definitely not.' But that, as well all know, does very little to reduce the allure of the latest and greatest... I plan on doing a little shopping on Saturday, should I pass a DoCoMo shop, I may find myself stopping in for a chat...
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
Looks like another few years of Bush...
Well, the last vote hasn't exactly been counted yet... but with Ohio looking like it will fall to Dubya, it would appear at this point that the world can expect another few years with him as 'leader of the free world'... whatever the hell THAT is supposed to mean.
I can't say I like the man, but on the plus side, he isn't anywhere near as funny-head-shaped as Kerry - and John Howard won't have to waste any time sucking up to a whole new US administration...
Still, things could be better.
I can't say I like the man, but on the plus side, he isn't anywhere near as funny-head-shaped as Kerry - and John Howard won't have to waste any time sucking up to a whole new US administration...
Still, things could be better.
Well, I know I am feeling cultured
Happy culture day everyone! Yes, that's right, today is culture day in Japan - and a public holiday no less. Unless you work for bastards, in which case you find yourself in a similar situation to myself - at work and resenting it. Evidently, the phrase 'public holiday' has yet to sink in with the nazis in the personnel department.
The fact that I seem to have come down with a mild cold and would much rather be at home resting and relaxing than sitting in one of the very few occupied office buildings in the greater Tokyo area has done nothing to improve my mood.
So what's new with me? Well, not a great deal to be honest.
The weekend was only mildly eventful, I caught up with some friends from my study abroad trip three years ago, Natsuyo and Ayaka (my and Mike's ex-girlfriends, respectively) and Chichi, who I met but only vaguely remembered. It was less akward than you would expect, and quite amusing in several regards. I will always remember Ayaka as (although a 2nd year uni student) having the appearance, and mental age of a 13 year old. I did a massive double take when I saw her with short hair and wearing a suit. I don't know what happened to her in the last three years, but 'professional' is never an adjective I would've used to describe her back then.
Natsuyo had changed much less, although I was relieved to hear her taste in music had improved. I still rue the fact that I dated somebody who both enjoyed the music of, and vehemently maintained the heterosexuality of the Backstreet Boys. What can I say? I was young and naive.
After a bit of shop-wandering, we grabbed some drinks at Hard Rock Cafe in Sakuragicho and went to the cinemas to see Collateral. It was a little predictable, but overall a pretty enjoyable film. Worth watching, but I wouldn't buy it when it comes out on DVD. Rent and copy maybe, but not buy.
Lately, I have become a bit of a dirty pirate. Such is the bane of having a DVD burner, I suppose. I have, however, resolved to get myself a copy of the Kill Bill box set. I rented the second one on Monday night, and was reminded how cool it was. Pai Mei reminded me of Chuin, master of the House of Sinanju in the (probably cult classic - or simply forgotten) Destroyer books. Next time I am online looking at books, I might have to track some of these down.
As for the last few days of work, as predicted, I have become rather busy again, having spent a number of hours in the last few days talking to Mr. O about the Aussie business, being lumped with dealing with our UK and US operations (while Tony is 'living it up' in the frozen wastes of Northern England), and complying with requests from my superiors to do something about the sheer volume of files that these two subsidiaries generate.
The beautiful part - today should be a fucking holiday.
Well, I'm done bitching. Here is some wisdom from the White Ninja:
The fact that I seem to have come down with a mild cold and would much rather be at home resting and relaxing than sitting in one of the very few occupied office buildings in the greater Tokyo area has done nothing to improve my mood.
So what's new with me? Well, not a great deal to be honest.
The weekend was only mildly eventful, I caught up with some friends from my study abroad trip three years ago, Natsuyo and Ayaka (my and Mike's ex-girlfriends, respectively) and Chichi, who I met but only vaguely remembered. It was less akward than you would expect, and quite amusing in several regards. I will always remember Ayaka as (although a 2nd year uni student) having the appearance, and mental age of a 13 year old. I did a massive double take when I saw her with short hair and wearing a suit. I don't know what happened to her in the last three years, but 'professional' is never an adjective I would've used to describe her back then.
Natsuyo had changed much less, although I was relieved to hear her taste in music had improved. I still rue the fact that I dated somebody who both enjoyed the music of, and vehemently maintained the heterosexuality of the Backstreet Boys. What can I say? I was young and naive.
After a bit of shop-wandering, we grabbed some drinks at Hard Rock Cafe in Sakuragicho and went to the cinemas to see Collateral. It was a little predictable, but overall a pretty enjoyable film. Worth watching, but I wouldn't buy it when it comes out on DVD. Rent and copy maybe, but not buy.
Lately, I have become a bit of a dirty pirate. Such is the bane of having a DVD burner, I suppose. I have, however, resolved to get myself a copy of the Kill Bill box set. I rented the second one on Monday night, and was reminded how cool it was. Pai Mei reminded me of Chuin, master of the House of Sinanju in the (probably cult classic - or simply forgotten) Destroyer books. Next time I am online looking at books, I might have to track some of these down.
As for the last few days of work, as predicted, I have become rather busy again, having spent a number of hours in the last few days talking to Mr. O about the Aussie business, being lumped with dealing with our UK and US operations (while Tony is 'living it up' in the frozen wastes of Northern England), and complying with requests from my superiors to do something about the sheer volume of files that these two subsidiaries generate.
The beautiful part - today should be a fucking holiday.
Well, I'm done bitching. Here is some wisdom from the White Ninja:
